lasstt nightt

I sit here, feeling the summer breeze..while i reminice the words you said last night.. the words that gave me hope that there could be a chance between us. I don't know whether you meant them or not but i couldn't care less for once you gave me attention and i will hold on to those words for as long as I can.

Last night, when you kept hugging me and gazing into my eyes i felt soo happy and easy. I love you i just wanted to say it but i didn't want to ruin the moment just incase you ddnt feel the same way. But as i said before i WILL wait for as long as i can... one day you will get over your ex and hopefully you'd give us another chance..

regretful wish.

I feel guit and regret for wishing this to happen, wishing that you two would break up. You don't deserve this. It's not fair that you have to go through this.. you should be with someone you deserve..Im not saying that you should be with me coz i've already hurted you enough but someone who is worth your love. Someone that will appreciate every little thing you do and would return greater love than what you're giving..I wish i could be that peroson but unfortunately i can only give what i have, and you deserve more than i could give.. more than i have. For now i can only wish that you would end up with the right person and that both of you will realise how you really feel for each other and no matter what happens in the end. i'd be here to help you move on and be there to give you as much comfort as you need.

soo much fun!

I thougth today would suck soo bad! I mean, I really thought i'd have to baby sit an 8 year old while watching my brother and his girlfriend act all lovey dovey all day at the caravan site :) But HEY! believe it or not!?? i loved ittt!! purrely loved it!! i did keep the little girl companyt but it wasnt as hard as i thought it would've been.. I lve watching my brothert and his GF to have finally spend time together and see how affectionate they are towards each other.. I love the way they annoy each other and then make up in the end lol.. it's soo cuute! I wish i could be with someone i would be happy with.. just like them :D
We did alot of things together and my brother paid for everything lool.. poor guy.. :P we hired this bike and cycled around the caravan park! it hurted my butt! damn! lol.. We also spent most of the time in the arcade winning and collecting as much tickets as possible...we ended up collecting 413 tickets and got it replaced with two teddy keyring which my brother and his gf had.. and a lucky teddy keyring for mee!! :D
I love the bit where we went to the lake and just had loads of chats and laughed together. it was amazing the sun is right and the breeze feels good on our skin.
I wish I could be this happy all the time. forgetting about everything lol everything taht makes me all bumbed and pessimists :P

i long to tell you...

The moment I open my eyes till I shut them at night, it's still you that i think of. It's crazy! I don't know how you make me feel this way, but all i know is that there's something about you that makes me thirst for more! Maybe it's the way you look into my eyes and how i gaze back realising how beautiful you are and how this makes me certain that you're all i want.. all iever want. I know you would hate it if i say I love you, but what am i suppose to say when every little thing you do makes me feel this way?
You're like the air I breath. Without you.. I'd die! i know you probably think i'm being over the top about this whole thing but i got no other ways of expressing how important you are to me. ugh!! i hate this.. im "in love" with someone who i'm not going out with.. it kills me to think that we can never be together.. I've wasted too many chances.. and i hate myself for letting those time pass by. Maybe if i was alert enough at the time, i would've payed you more attention and returned the love and affection you deserved.. but now it's far too late.. you're with someone who i think you're better off with... I'm so stupid to have taken you're presence for granted and never realised how special you are..
I know this would sound mean but i sometimes wish that you two would break up so i could have another chance to be with you, but NO! i cnt think this way.. i can't hope for this to happen.. I want you to be happy and never get hurt.. i guess i'll just have to accept the fact that i'm too late.. i'll have to just let you go and be happy that you're in love with someone who will treat you better and give you better care than i can..
I don't know where to start.. how to move on and how to forget.. I long to tell you everything but i'm way too late..and plus, i dnt have the gutts to tell you,,, i'm too much of a wuss!
Seeing you happy with someone else hurts me alot coz i think of what if that someone else was me? maybe my life would be alot happier and i would be over the moon to have you heer in my life...

I'll be here still waiting for a secind chance... and this time if that opportunity comes again i will definitely graps it with both hands, hold on tight and put as much effort as i can to make eveything the way it should be.. I love you and i can only hope for you to feel the the same way as i do..